You can’t make anyone love you. You just have to reveal who you are and take your chances. Oh sure, you can give a pleasing impression to others, flatter and appease them. But whether by cajoling or by coercing, you cannot elicit a gift of love. Instead, you may call forth a reward for good behavior. But then you are stuck with living with the feeling in your chest that if people really knew what you were like, no one would really care about you. Or, if you succeed in getting your own way by bullying other people, then you must live with the dread of retaliation, if ever you should drop your menacing guard.