20 things i’ve learned the hard way


  1. Don’t buy flavored olive oil. Ew.
  2. While you can dye/bleach your hair yourself, paying for a professional haircut is almost always worth it.
  3. Maintenance is easier than repair. (This applies to cars and relationships.)
  4. Be careful what you say when you’re drunk. It can haunt the other person (and/or you) for years.
  5. Plants need water, man!
  6. If there is a problem with your dishwasher/cat’s teeth/etc., it probably won’t “just go away on its own” (unfortunately).
  7. If an electric outlet isn’t working, check if there’s a light switch that needs to be flipped on BEFORE you call an electrician. They’ll charge you for making the trip out there.
  8. Some really popular things (Harry Potter, Rihanna) are popular for a reason. Avoiding them because they’re popular or because of a preconceived judgment is silly. Why not try ’em?
  9. Conversely, trying to work up excitement about something everyone else likes and you don’t is a waste of energy. It’s OK to disagree. You’re entitled to your own tastes and preferences, as long as you aren’t an asshole.
  10. Buying something you don’t love because it’s on sale is almost always a bad idea.
  11. Get a mattress protector. Periods happen. Absolutely no one wants a stained mattress when you move/get a new one.
  12. Speaking of, memory foam is cushy but HOT. Avoid.
  13. If you anxiously call a tow truck, make sure you get an ETA. Hearing they’ll be there “soon” but not knowing how soon “soon” is will only make you more anxious.
  14. If you’re about to get a massage and the masseuse is like “I’m so sick of calming ocean sounds. OK if I put on something a little more upbeat?” but you kind of want soothing ocean sounds, you can politely disagree/try to come to a compromise. It’s your massage!
  15. Kittens are a LOT of work (and will cost you sleep). Apparently this is also true of human children???????
  16. Always get a paint sample before you paint a room. Otherwise sunny yellow will turn out to be nacho cheese.
  17. You can’t expect to do anything perfectly (or even well) the first time (or the first few times). Failure is normal and should be celebrated–it means you’re trying, which is more than a lot of people can say!
  18. Asking someone, “What do you mean?” or “Can you clarify?” will save you hours, whether it’s hours of anguish from misunderstanding, or doing something that wasn’t what they wanted. Asking those questions doesn’t mean you’re stupid or a bad listener. It means you have different ways of communicating, or they were vague, or they’re just a bad communicator.
  19. If you walk into an office for a job interview and it’s very 1980s, and you can tell that working there will be like smooshing your funky circle self into a square hole, no amount of money/awesome benefits is worth it. You will be miserable.
  20. If someone likes you, you’ll know.

2 thoughts on “20 things i’ve learned the hard way

  1. Lanette Smith

    Amen, sister!!!! “in our life there is a single color.Β  it is the color of love.” –marc chagall

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