dressing like a toddler for fun and profit

You know what’s overrated? Dressing like a grownup.

I went through a brief period of Trying To Look Professional (coinciding with a certain job). You know, blazers, flattering colors, and all that. Now that I work from home or in a casual coworking space, I’m back to Looking Like a Goddamn Hot Mess. J/k, I still try to look presentable…but in an Eccentric Glamour kind of way.

Enter DRESSING LIKE A CHILD.

Why are all the fun clothes made for kids? I swear:

SOMEone (ahem, serious fashion designers) decided women only wanted to wear olive green and navy and black and white. When REALLY some of us want to wear neon rainbows and watermelons all the time, and preferably not in polyester, thankyouverymuch. (Thankfully, Lazy Oaf and Gorman seem to realize this, though they’re pretty spendy.)

Lately, I’ve been embracing my inner child by ordering some pink cotton bike shorts to wear under mini dresses and wearing t-shirts under strappy/cleavage-y sundresses. To hell with looking chic or sophisticated! It’s not like I spend my free time slinking around jazz bars, martini in hand. More like taking long naps and running down the street to catch the bus.

Is subtlety only for the borings? Will my therapist have a field day analyzing what this means about my maturity level and comfort with my SEXUALITY and WOMANHOOD? Tune in next time! J/k, we’ll probably talk about butterscotch pudding next time. SORRRRREEEEE!

How to dress like Claudia Kishi

Is any fictional character more beloved for her personal style than CLAUDIA KISHI?

claudia kishi fashion outfits wardrobe

Unquestionably the best member of The Babysitters Club books (a ’90s-child staple), Claudia was *~the artsy one~* and the most relatable (for me, at least). Claud is known for her terrible spelling, candy addiction, and FUNKY FRESH wardrobe, which author Ann M. Martin (and her ghostwriters) describe in deliciously painstaking detail in every book. While struggling with school and comparisons to her genius sister, Janine, Claudia expressed her creativity through amazing thrifted mish-mash outfits. They revolve around a few key staples:

  • Leggings
  • Vests
  • Cowboy boots
  • CRAZY PRINTS & PATTERNS!!!
  • Hoops or novelty earrings
  • Long funky necklaces
  • High ponytails with scrunchies

So much yes.

claudia kishi outfits fashion

Claud was the original hipster, but in an unpretentious way (she was cool because she was messy and had her own phone line, not because she listened to the “right” bands). She wasn’t self-obsessed. She mostly cared about babysitting, painting, reading Nancy Drew mysteries, being a good friend, and hanging out with her grandma, Mimi. She lacked the snobby narcissism of Stacey, the mousy spinelessness of Mary Anne, and the controlling type-A-ness of Kristy. (Wow, I guess I didn’t like the other characters much!)

And of any of the characters, Claudia left the biggest mark on pop culture, inspiring a comic, a fashion blog, and countless style posts (including this one!). Half Japanese, she was also a role model for Asian-American readers (although writers did focus on her “exotic”-ness and “almond-shaped eyes” too much).

So eat a doughnut, hit up your favorite thrift store, and twirl the cord of your landline around your finger! ❤ u 4ever, Claudia.

some fall 2017 lewkz

*~ladeez of the canyon~*

Etro (aren’t they missing an R? har har) is delightfully Claudia-Kishi-circa-1970 this fall. Inspo: sheepskin, thrift-store scarves, bubblegum Joni Mitchell??? All the hot pink/floral/lime green/leopard print, plz.

etro-fall-2017-rtw-runway-collage

photos via WWD

Aaaa! Are your eyes overwhelmed too? Quick, look at this water:

water

PALETTE CLEANSER! Whew. OK, ready for more?

tWiSteD SISteR

How about Giamba, which one can only assume is inspired by Black Swan, grandma’s old nighties, and tarot cards:

giamba 2017

Photos via WWD

Suggested taglines: Saccharine with a side of evil. Or maybe More cookies, Skeletor? SOMEone discovered pastel goth! X-P

All right, that’s all we’ve got for Holly Pretends To Be A Fashion Person While Clearly Being Woefully Undereducated. Tune in next time for styles inspired by The Wild West meets gummi vitamins.

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a bright, glam, maximalist capsule wardrobe

Capsule wardrobes are everywhere right now. But most of them seem to be made up of snooze-worthy neutrals: lots of black, white, and gray. Those that have “a pop of color!!!!” include, like, one navy/olive/eggplant top or scarf. PASS.

And yet I’m realizing that even though I’m a maximalist in some ways (bright colors! ruffles! asymmetry! leopard print! layers!), I don’t actually want a closetful of crappy fast fashion. I have the bizarre-o desire to save my money for quality clothing I love to death and that will last.

GASP! Is this maximal minimalism? (Minimal maximalism? Messy simplicity? Bright, uh, something?)

Inspired by my stylish frayun Kelly (of Feminist Sticker Club and Cat Sticker Club fame), I’m toying with the idea of slowly creating a capsule wardrobe…but one heavy on PINK and SHAGGY TEXTURE and SHINE:

bright pink capsule wardrobe

(Gold miniskirt: Never has it been so clear that “versatile” is subjective. THAT PINK SHAG COAT THO)

Seems like the point of a capsule wardrobe is to buy fewer, better things that delight you; wear them often; and keep them for a long time. (“Better” being a vague catchall for quality, fair-trade, eco-friendly, etc. etc.)

I, erm, basically have the opposite of a capsule wardrobe. While I typically assuage my consumer guilt by shopping at Goodwill and frequently purging stuff from my closet (thanks, Marie Kondo!), this results in a sort of CHURN ‘N’ BURN that doesn’t actually reduce my consumption. I admit it: I’m a (fashion) commitment-phobe. Novelty gives me a rush.

confessions of a shopaholic gif

Anyway, I stumbled on the blog A Small Wardrobe and LOVE these guidelines for shopping:

– Only buy things that are exactly what I want.
– Only buy things that fit perfectly.
– Only buy things of good quality.

If only everything in my wardrobe fit those guidelines!

Notice that price isn’t part of the equation. As someone who, ahem, has difficulty sticking to a budget…

confessions of a shopaholic

…I know this means I have to patiently save up for nice stuff, NOT BUY A TON OF IT ALL AT ONCE. This will involve the dreaded Delayed Gratification I’ve heard so much about. (Hrrumph.)

In any case, I’d like to think zany, bright, colorful capsule wardrobes can exist. Jenna Lyons of J.Crew claims that leopard-print is a neutral. Why not?

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