quote of the day: “strong female leads”

I have mixed feelings on the phrase “strong women.” Years ago, a women told me, “Most of my friends are…[pause]…strong women.” It came off slightly condescending, insulting, and confusing. Was she saying most women AREN’T strong? Was she using “strong” as a euphemism for “loud,” “difficult,” and/or “opinionated”? (Which women should be allowed to be,Continue reading “quote of the day: “strong female leads””

dispatches from the end of the world

hello! are you still alive? good job! it’s a weird time to be alive. emails about coronavirus are annoying. emails that aren’t about coronavirus seem tone-deaf. we got an inch of snow yesterday, in March. THE WORLD IS ENDING! everything is fine! i go back and forth several times an hour. words, as always, areContinue reading “dispatches from the end of the world”

Which Golden Girl are you? An existential crisis

I am a Rose. Always have been, probably always will be. But I’ve spent most of my life trying to be the other ones. Sure, Rose is sweet. But she’s the one you make fun of for being so innocent and optimistic and ditzy. Dorothy is the cool one. Dorothy is the equivalent of beingContinue reading “Which Golden Girl are you? An existential crisis”

who i have a crush on

People who thank the bus driver. People who tip extra. People who let people with one or two items go ahead in the grocery store line. People who help empty the dishwasher at work even though it’s not “their job.” People who pick up litter. People who flatten their cardboard boxes before recycling them. PeopleContinue reading “who i have a crush on”

there’s nothing wrong with you

My therapist told me that today. Not in a “We’re done here; you’ve evolved and are perfect, TRUMPET NOISE!!!!1” way (snort). In a “You go through life thinking you’re bad and wrong and messed up and THAT’S why people are shitty and that’s not true” way. There’s nothing wrong with me. Or you. WHAT A REVOLUTIONARYContinue reading “there’s nothing wrong with you”

breakup town: how to date someone avoidant

tl;dr You can’t. They won’t let you. You’ll try to get close & it’ll feel like banging your head against a wall. This reinforces your beliefs of inadequacy. THOSE ARE A LIE. YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH JUST AS YOU ARE. RUN.

wtf is hygge?

Hygge is so trendy that it’s almost obnoxious, but recently on three (!) occasions, I found myself struggling to explain it to people who hadn’t heard of it (probably because they do more with their lives than read Apartment Therapy). Anyway, the Danish concept of “hygge” (which I guess you say HUE-geh or HOO-guh dependingContinue reading “wtf is hygge?”

Where my basic bitchez at?

Confession: I am listening to Dolly Parton and reading a Harlequin romance novel about a librarian titled Love Overdue. WHAT THE FUCK (Yes, moooost of my blog post ideas of late are just retreads of the same theme: “OMG I just realized I can stop hating XYZ and repressing myself and just like what IContinue reading “Where my basic bitchez at?”