stanning for taylor swift

Taylor Swift’s new single from her first album in three years (“Look What You Made Me Do“) is getting mixed reactions, to put it mildly. Taylor stans like myself (not sorry) are excited, if slightly let down by the repetitive lyrics, and Taylor haters have come outta the woodwork with everything from lulz-worthy memes (below) to downright vitriol.

I get it:

  1. Taylor Swift is not Beyonce and reputation will be no Lemonade. Do we really need to pit two female pop stars against each other, though? Isn’t there room for both? Beyonce is god and Taylor is…the unholy spirit, or something? OBVIOUSLY Tay’s new album is not going to be groundbreakingly insightful into the black American female experience.
  2. Taylor Swift is a privileged white cis thin able-bodied woman from a wealthy family. No denying that. You know who else is white, cis, able-bodied, privileged, and actually evil/taking people’s rights away? Trump. When’s the last time Taylor tried to limit abortion access?
  3. When the 2016 election prompted lots of pop stars to speak out in favor of Hillary (or just against Trump), Taylor didn’t. But who says she has to use her platform and influence to send messages outside of music? OH WAIT, by donating a quarter of a million dollars to Kesha and winning a sexual assault case for which she only wanted $1, Taylor isn’t doing enough. I see now. You have to admit this is pretty cool (and definite progress for her):

    “I acknowledge the privilege that I benefit from in life, in society and in my ability to shoulder the enormous cost of defending myself in a trial like this. My hope is to help those whose voices should also be heard. Therefore, I will be making donations in the near future to multiple organizations that help sexual assault victims defend themselves.”

  4. Taytay appropriates other cultures. Yes, no one has forgotten the cringe-worthy video for “Shake It Off.” But why are people so much quicker to forgive Miley, Gwen Stefani, and Katy Perry for the same thing?
  5. Taylor–wait for it–wants to make money. She has corporate partnerships with brands like UPS. How dare she! She should be Joni Mitchell and only make music for shits ‘n’ giggles ‘n’ the odd feather that floats down from the tree under which she strums her guitar. Snort. I don’t have to love capitalism to get that some people DO.
  6. Taylor plays the victim. Yep! But can you really say “How dare she go after a black man” (Kanye) when HE’S the one who (inaccurately) rapped “I made that bitch famous,” featured a naked likeness of her in a video, and leaked a phone call of her taped and released without her consent?

So much of the Taylor hate seems to damn her simply for playing the game like everyone else. Celebrities HAVE to control and manage their image and choose their own narrative–otherwise the media will, with only an eye for whatever trash gets the most clicks. Taylor is smart, type A, and wants to make money–are those really reasons enough to call her the devil?

Yes, of COURSE I’d love it if she actually became an outspoken intersectional feminist icon and vocally supported, say, Black Lives Matter, reproductive rights, and LGBTQ rights. But no one asks that of Adele or Fergie or the gazillions of other pop stars out there. Taylor’s held to a higher, unattainable standard simply because of her success. She’s not “woke”–so what? Crucify someone else who actually deserves it, like the Republican party.

do agree with this:

People aren’t perfect and we as society shouldn’t expect people to be so. But that doesn’t mean that Swift or anyone else is free from critique. Nor does it mean that we should just ignore problematic behavior because of a few good actions.

Yes, Taylor Swift is one of my “problematic faves.” I’d rather enjoy TSwift fandom with caveats and my eyes wide open than write her off altogether. (There are plenty of other famous white feminists I side-eye, like Lena Dunham and Sofia Coppola.)


Oh no you didn’t, Serena Williams

Serena Williams on having a kid in a month:

I have so much respect for so many women [for giving birth]. I am about to be a real woman now, you know? It’s going to be something incredibly impressive to go through.

Oh NO hunty. Really? Childbirth makes you “a real woman”? NOPE. What about women who are infertile? What about trans women? What about those of us who simply don’t want kids?

Elsewhere in the interview she calls herself a feminist and says “I like to stick up for women and women’s rights.” Hopefully someone kindly clues her in that plenty of real women don’t have kids.

dressing like a toddler for fun and profit

You know what’s overrated? Dressing like a grownup.

I went through a brief period of Trying To Look Professional (coinciding with a certain job). You know, blazers, flattering colors, and all that. Now that I work from home or in a casual coworking space, I’m back to Looking Like a Goddamn Hot Mess. J/k, I still try to look presentable…but in an Eccentric Glamour kind of way.


Why are all the fun clothes made for kids? I swear:

SOMEone (ahem, serious fashion designers) decided women only wanted to wear olive green and navy and black and white. When REALLY some of us want to wear neon rainbows and watermelons all the time, and preferably not in polyester, thankyouverymuch. (Thankfully, Lazy Oaf and Gorman seem to realize this, though they’re pretty spendy.)

Lately, I’ve been embracing my inner child by ordering some pink cotton bike shorts to wear under mini dresses and wearing t-shirts under strappy/cleavage-y sundresses. To hell with looking chic or sophisticated! It’s not like I spend my free time slinking around jazz bars, martini in hand. More like taking long naps and running down the street to catch the bus.

Is subtlety only for the borings? Will my therapist have a field day analyzing what this means about my maturity level and comfort with my SEXUALITY and WOMANHOOD? Tune in next time! J/k, we’ll probably talk about butterscotch pudding next time. SORRRRREEEEE!

badass lady summer jams

’80s ladies via GLOW, ’90s house, new Kesha = SUMMATHYME

p.s. everyone should listen to cupcakKe; she is UHMAZING ❤

wut r u listening 2 this summrrrr

journal #6

remember when my favorite colors wuz pink & green


breakup town: how to date someone avoidant

tl;dr You can’t.

They won’t let you.

You’ll try to get close & it’ll feel like banging your head against a wall.

This reinforces your beliefs of inadequacy. THOSE ARE A LIE. YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH JUST AS YOU ARE.


Read More